It was a harrowing experience, but I am so thankful that I have a fierce, brave warrior of a wife who able to face down one of life’s toughest challenges and emerge unscathed, if not even stronger.
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I love fairy tales. In particular, I love the happy ending of fairy tales, where everything works out in the end and life is super-dee-duper perfect at the end of the story. I am a bit of a sentimental sap in this manner. I want the good guy to win. I want karma to be exacted on those deserving, both good and bad. And ultimately, I want the protagonist to live happily ever after.
I’m not a real physically affectionate person.
Sure, I’ll give my kids an occasional passing pat on the head, and my wife and I have a firm handshake goodnight at the end of each evening. But that’s really quite enough.
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The perfect Christmas card picture
For the past few years, I have had the task of taking pictures of my kids and my two nephews for my mom’s annual Christmas card. While technically this is my parent’s Christmas card, it has become known as Grandma’s Christmas Card, because of its origins.
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New laws for a better world
I know most Americans think that we have enough laws in this land. We have more laws, regulations, statutes and mandates that we can even comprehend.
And so a common refrain is that we have too many laws, a cumbersome, layered system in which the last thing we need are NEW laws. And to that I say, we may have too many laws. But we do not enough of the CORRECT laws. As we continue to add law after law after law, we have failed to pinpoint a few key areas in which we, as a nation, must ask — nay, demand — that our lawmakers put aside their petty differences and step up for the greater good immediately. Below are some instant changes that will make my…er… our world a better place, and I know that there is not a decent American among us who would disagree.
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The cart war wages on
I knew there would be a lot of changes when I moved my family to a new city.
New schools. New job. Learning my way around. But it’s nice to know that, wherever you go, you can always guarantee one discomfort of home: people not returning their shopping carts.
It’s an amazing fact that I am able to write this column after the Old Man and the Sea battle I have waged with a shark that can only be described as school bus size.
So I was sitting at a restaurant recently with my family when I heard the blare of a siren.
Naturally, I did what any person would do and began looking around wildly for my chance to rubberneck. Ambulance? Fire truck? Police and a live performance of “Cops!”? Oh the possibilities!
Yes, baseball is America’s pastime, despite the fact that it currently lags in popularity behind about eight other sports, reality TV shows and yoga.
I have a very simple recommendation for my kids to live a happy and fulfilling adult life: Never own anything. Ever.
I base this simple life changing piece of knowledge on the fact that I have recently packed up the contents of the house I have lived in for the past 14 years, and I have decided that I have approximately 150 percent too much stuff.